Kind attention parents –
Parents of grade 1 children please wait in the reception area. The class coordinator will address you soon.’ The announcement was made by school staff and we waited eagerly to be addressed by the primary class coordinator. Excitement is palpable on each parent’s face, as kids have just graduated from pre-primary to primary schooling.
Within few minutes the coordinator arrived and she briefed us about the procedural changes from grade 1 onwards. I was quite enthusiastic about the whole transformation when she mentioned ‘reading’. Yes reading four pages from school reader daily.
‘What four pages daily?‘
‘How are they going to read so much?‘
‘This is too much to expect from such small kids.‘
‘Come on they are just 6 years.‘ All were petrified by this rule from the coordinator, including me as I know she has nil interest in reading.
‘Looks like there is no other way to it; let’s get them in the reading mission’, a friend concluded and I fervently nodded knowing it is going to be a gigantic task for me.
Mommy on Mission Reading
Over the time I had gathered dozens of interesting books for her, which does not interest her at all. Wonder why? I love reading, give me a nice book then I do not need anything more. Father’s genes may be at work, he hates reading too. God knows how he braves my articles!
Anyways, we sat down with the mission to finish one page at a time. We started with easy words and then sentences. To my surprise, she knew all sounds, phonics, and some blending too but had no interest in reading. Concentration span is just 10 minutes when it comes to reading, you give her math, writing or art-book she won’t budge for hours. So what is the problem? Her interest, books or something else.
Find the Snag and Fix it –
I was in the middle of a telephonic conversation when she interrupted me, I gestured her to be quiet. She did not budge; kept on pulling me & disturbing. Irritated by such confusing commotion, I discontinued my phone and asked her “What is wrong with you!! Can’t you see I was on phone?” Dispirited she looked at me “Mumma I read the whole page, which we were doing yesterday“, and retrieved to her room. I felt a pang of guilt for being rude to her, but did she actually read it whole?
In the evening when husband arrived we discussed what happened in the afternoon. She was busy playing with her building blocks, darn she made such good buildings. ‘Beta, I pray you become the top architect and make a beautiful home‘, I playfully quipped.
‘Yes, Mumma I will make a big house and we will live on the sea-side.’ She replied with glee in her eyes.
‘But sweetheart WHY don’t you read well? Even teacher has asked you to read, read and read.’ I probed a little.
‘You only keep saying I don’t have any interest in reading all the time, so I do not like reading.’ She replied with such ease and my eyes popped out in a blow.
Gottcha! said her dad and left me all on my own to think and introspect.
Pay Kind Attention to your words
Parents influence children the most and any impression, a reaction from us affect them seriously.
Choose your words wisely, they have power to make or break anyone.
In the above scenario, I never wished her to lose interest in reading. But my statement, which I inadvertently used to describe her interest backfired badly. She made an opinion about herself, based on my impressions. Which is not true at all.
So we started working on to reverse the damage. We sit with our own books in hand daily, she reads her and I read mine (read pretend). Slowly we are making this a habit and turning a negative impression into a positive one.
Happy reading everyone 😉 Parenting ain’t easy my friends, we rise and fall but we all learn together.
This post is written for #BlogchatterA2Z series by Blogchatter, and my theme for this challenge is Gleeful Parenting. Previously from the series –
I for Ignite creativity.
J for Jumble Bumble.
14 Comments
The exact same thing happened with me the other day, D. I told someone she doesn’t like fruits, I meant whole fruits. She likes them chopped. She heard half of it and is not even bananas now. Mamma said she doesn’t like fruits. That’s why!
We do end up influencing them at times. Without even realising it. Glad you worked it out.
This is such a wise post. . I would definitely recommend for the people parenting young kids.
Aah! So Right! Can’t agree more, we make an opinion and reiterate it to etch onnkid’s brain. I will watch out for this buddy. Great post?
Children are like sponge. They absorb whatever that falls on their ears and eyes.
It occurs me now that sometimes, I casually use the words like, “dumbo”, “buffoon” while conversing. I better watch my words, Dipika.
Agree with you. The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice, so yes, we need to very careful of what and how we speak to them.
Excellent post, dipika. What we say or think out loud is what our kids affirm to. This post serves as a reminder to choose my words wisely.
Excellent post dipika. What we say or think out loud is what our kids affirm to. This post serves as a reminder to choose our words wisely before kids.
The words parents use to raise, discipline, and educate their children can have a significant effect on their behavior and development. Your kids aren’t the media. They are your blood. Raising kids is one of the toughest and most fulfilling jobs in the world — and the one for which you might feel the least prepared. Avoid making loaded statements or using words as weapons. Comments like “What a stupid thing to do!” or “You act more like a baby than your little brother!” cause damage just as physical blows do. Choose your words carefully and be compassionate. Let your kids know that everyone makes mistakes and that you still love them, even when you don’t love their behavior.
This is an interesting suggestion. It probably works on the principles of setting the norm through peer influence or conformity in a positive way. I think most Indian households make this work in matters such as family prayers.
Great topic. Loved reading this.
Do drop by mine.
Cheers,
CRD
Words have a strong power. More than we even know. There are many times when I say things to my kids and regret later. It’s really important to.choose our words carefully. Good one.
I have realised how careful we need to be when talking to and around children. They are like a sponge, they absorb everything, and it stays with them forever. Glad you wrote this post,Dipika. It should alert a lot of parents.
This is really true. WE tend to leave our own impressions in kid’s minds without realizing it. My son likes to read but my daughter never was into reading much. She loved the audio or video of the book if available more out of laziness. Now i find her reading up quite a few of them in Wattpad just bcoz she follows a few celebs and would want to know about them more, It suits me in a way because she is atleast found something interesting to read even though it is via digital mode. You penned some awesome thoughts Dipika
Yes Parents and Mentors need to be very careful to choose their words, kids are very tender hearted and grasp the exact words in their mindset permanently just because elders says so.
Cheers
MeenalSonal from AuraOfThoughts
This is something to learn, our words have so much influence which ma turn good or bad for us.