I am so thankful to GOD for blessing me with a complexion which is a valid certificate to achieve the biggest and greatest aim of life – a wealthy groom! Yes, I am not kidding; the most crucial & significant gear a girl can possess to have a secured and satisfied future as a wealthy wife is to have a gori-chitti skin tone. Well that’s what I have been hearing from all my neighbouring aunties and buas and taais and chachis, the list goes on…
Till date my mental calibre is unable to perform a simple calculation – the connection between: Fair Complexion & Wealthier Groom. It has to be something very sacred or taboo, that’s the reason my granny never gave out the secret. Or probably my maths/reasoning was always under utilised areas; hence she must felt pity on her poor grand daughter and saved me from all that duress. Once my next door aunt told my mother; “aapko toh tension nahi hai bhabhi, ye itni gori hai… abhi se acche rishton ki line lag jaayegi”. I was speechless to even comment or show my dismissal. (For the record, I chose my partner myself and without bothering about his tone or undertone) 🖖🖖
Being a North Indian I have grown up with the constant reminder of gora-kaala complexion. We say westerners are racist but have we ever wondered how we – the most culturally diverse and rich society behave when it comes to race, colour, creed and such trivial stuff. The insane race to get the natural complexion altered by some shades is maddening. You walk in to any beauty/cosmetics shop, more then half products talk only about skin whitening or fairer skin in 3 weeks or so. Recently I read about Nandita Das being open about her experience in the entertainment industry and how she boycotted all “skin whitening cosmetics”. This is not a superficial issue, but it lies deep inside our roots….that knowingly or unknowingly we are following the same cognitive pattern our forefathers have charted ages back…
One day my daughter asked me if she can also have tea, she is still so young to have tea and I refused her. But the way I refused her made me think twice and whack myself in the head….. “if you drink tea; you will become black like tea“. She looked at me and asked mom you drink tea all the time why aren’t you black then????? This made me realise that even if I don’t have this belief of dark/light skin tone but my reasoning is still incorrect; probably because this is how we have been brought up in our society.
Open any matrimonial page in your news daily, and you will see – required a fair, beautiful girl for a handsome boy. We all are attracted towards “fair”, what about the other traits in a girl? Will a fair skin girl provide extra income to a lower middle class family? Will she make special food that a dark or wheatish skin tone girl can’t? Or she’l be able to climb corporate ladder multiple positions in one stroke??? None of this is possible depending on complexion so what’s the big deal about it? Remember all those television ads where the actor says; 5 din mein yaha se waha (from dark to snow white) I wonder if Yami Gautam is boon for Film Industry or Fairness providing cosmetic brands (pun intended). Media reports covering our favourite celebrities often term some chosen ones as ‘dark and dusky beauty’; again my stance is WHY DO WE NEED THIS DIFFERENCE?
We as mother’s or guardians of upcoming generation can bring about a change, only when we inculcate this change in ourselves. It’s a gradual process, we probably have to unlearn many things but let’s do it for a FAIR future (I mean equal & reverent)
Hope you like reading this small take on our disbalanced likes & dislikes. Don’t forget to leave your comments below. Thank You for reading…. keep loving and following @gleefulblogger