Child – Education beyond books

Sunita worked as house-help all her life; washing dishes, mopping floors, sweeping, laundry she accepts any of these chores with a smile. With fixed changes for each job, she is highly recommended house help of her area. Over chatty if you give her a chance by asking questions about her three children – two daughters and one son. She toils from morning to-night with a dream, a dream to get them the highest education to overcome poverty and live a respectable life.

Around last summer vacations her elder daughter escaped with a boy from their neighborhood, she was inconsolable. A sincere college student with a handsome earning vocational job, took such an extreme step without any indication or warning bells. Obviously, Sunita could not accept this betrayal and took ill. By the time she came to terms with the reality, she received a notice from the police station. Her son is arrested in a forgery case, where he worked as delivery boy.

Her pain is beyond words, devastated by the personal losses she kept blaming herself and destiny. Children for whom she worked day and night, slogged her life in petty jobs have given her no happiness. She kept dreaming of their better future, but they chose their own life and ways. But who is to BLAME for this? Sunita, her children, her parenting or their eco-system?

Child Education and Eco-system

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­Eco-system our social space – We are social beings, and society marks huge impression on us. Interacting within our eco-system reflects us as part of social system. Education, parenting, learning, cultural, regional, technology are part of eco-system. All aspects of social life are inter-related and has influence on every facet.

Children learn from their experiences and exposures in society. In Sunita’s case, she gave best education and exposure to her kids but social factors were stronger determining factors. When it comes to education we give our children the best of our knowledge, however social factors are beyond our control. Bridging the gap with correct approach helps in balancing educational eco-system for children.

child development

Ways to create balance between education & eco-system

Discuss – discussion is the finest way to create a healthy and trust-worthy bond between relations. Keep the forum open to ask tough questions. There is no harm if child asks you questions beyond their age. If they have a query provide them right information and what better source than parents.

Do not paint the picture green – Keep it original, we often show them the bright side of every aspect but that’s not always true. It’s good that we try to enclose negativity, but knowing the real-life scenario is also vital. Imagine a situation when child is all on its own, but reality seems so dissimilar from what parents have explained. This also prepares them for uncertainties in future.

Education is also beyond the books – when we say educate, that’s not necessarily means bookish knowledge. Human values, sex-education, morality, culture, traditions, empathy life has many traits and a child must know this all. Teach them righteous ways of life, based on age and their understanding.

Unlearn to teach – when we explain a situation to children, we act as per our cognition. To think like them and enable better understanding, we have to unlearn our mind-blocks. For instance – screen time for kids is something I am not very comfortable with. But at the same time, abolishing screen time completely might turn into negative stimuli, as her peers have privilege of same. So, we work on a plan with limiting the screen-time based on her performance. She can only have her mobile apps and gaming when homework is completed on time.

We can only impart holistic education to our children, if we understand their complete eco-system.

This post is written for #BlogchatterA2Z series by Blogchatter, and my theme for this challenge is Gleeful Parenting. Previously from the series –

D for Discipline

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23 Comments

  1. A very important point raised, and explained beautifully, Dipika. As we get get more universal exposure, the Eco system around us dominates our thoughts and behaviour more than education can. Parents need to understand this, so I am really glad you chose this as the topic.

  2. Nice post, Dipika, especially the example you gave explains it all. As a parent we largely focus on giving our kids materialistic things, but our kids need much more than that. They need values too, hence it’s important to teach our kids values and also find out what else is influencing our kids apart from us. Education from books is anyway a half baked thing, education is much more than books.

  3. This was such a wonderful post Dipika.

    Not everyone is comfortable talking about the ecosystem or the peer group of children when it comes to child development, probably for fear of being judged as unfair and prejudiced. But it is a fact that in a scenario where you spend more than half your time awake with your peers, the quality of the ecosystem has a big impact on a child’s psyche.

    Thanks for bringing this up.

    Cheers,
    CRD

    CRD
    1. Thank You CRD for reading up, yeah how can we neglect this aspect of child development. Its one of the major areas which are out of my control, so have to walk carefully on it.
      Thanks again.

      gleefulblogger
  4. There are many Sunita amongst us, not necessarily in the lower strata of the society only. A lot needs to be learnt to keep pace with the changing eco-system around the future generation.
    Hard hitting example and the most practical, rational ways to handle the new age parenting, Dipika.

    Anagha Yatin
  5. Recently I read in the Hindustan Times a series on how to deal with issues pertaining to teenage children . A mother had described her plight. They are from affluent family based in Delhi. Until a year ago her son was a academically bright student and a sports person. As parents they don’t know what went wrong but now he has lost focus completely. He misses school, lies a lot, doesn’t listen to the parents at all. Not only that he abuses and hits the parents too. They have tried to take professional help but that didn’t help too. The mother had narrated that she fears for their lives. After reading your post, I could think of this incident as here the child had the best facilities and a smooth lifestyle but his social circle had such a bad influence on him. This is a valid point of discussion that you have raised Dipika. Parenting has become so tough nowadays. And effective communication with the child is the key.

  6. The environment around us has a major impact on children. I totally agree with your point that knowledge should not be restricted to books. I just hope that I can raise my child with a better understanding of the world around him.

  7. Rightly said Dipika, for a child to become a well-rounded adult he should develop a healthy social and emotional behaviour, which goes beyond bookish knowledge. Sadly new-age parenting lacks in teaching kids this.

  8. People are generally stuck in their ecosystem and try as they might probably it is difficult to move out it. I know of a maid who worked day in and out and wanted her daughter to study and come up in life but somehow the girl lost interest in studies and wanted to elope with some guy in locality. No amount of persuasion could get her to focus on her education.

  9. Ecosystem. such an important element in chilldren’s growth and yet never given attention to. Parents generally focus on education and school and not the holistic growth. The example you quoted sadly shows that a school alone is not responsible for a child’s growth.

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