Is there a foolproof strategy for a happy relationship? Any secret potion that makes a relationship work! Only if we knew, half of the world’s unhappy couples would have been living a happily ever after life. But, we know, life isn’t a fairy tale and love can’t solve all the problems. Hence, there are long queues outside family courts and divorce lawyers’ offices.
However, millions of happy couples have made their relationship work. There are little things that make you happy in a relationship. In this post, we will talk about 5 ‘open’ secrets of Happy and Healthy Relationships.
Are there any Tips for Building a Happy Relationship?
Well, there is no right or wrong answer to this question, it depends on the personal equations of people in a relationship. But, let us learn from the story of Sushma how she beat the odds and lived happily ever after with her beloved for a lifetime.
Sushma was sitting by her favorite corner, next to the veranda mogra shrub busy chanting with tulsi-mala, when Nidhi stormed inside from the front gate. Looking furious, she directly went to her old room, without even mentioning her arrival to anyone. It has become a daily affair ever since she and her husband moved to Baroda. Kaveesh, her poor husband usually comes by evening or the next day to make up and take her back home.
For hours she didn’t come out of her room, Finally, Madhu (mother) decided to go and check on her daughter, when, Kaveesh (Nidhi’a husband) entered from the front gate with a sorry face and droopy shoulders. Rishub (father) motioned him toward Nidhi’s room and within no time, she was out as if nothing ever happened. Everything was back to normal in no time, courtesy of Kaveesh.
Sushma was silently looking at the whole commotion, sipping her evening tea when Nidhi quipped her, ‘Ba, aren’t you going to share any neighborhood gossip with me today?’ Her granny gave a soft chuckle, and said, ‘I am going to tell you a story today, are you all up for it?’
Everyone gathered around Sushma, and she began –
Many years ago a young girl entered a temple compound with her shoes on. Priests and other elderly started yelling at her. Astounded she froze in a position unable to move when a young lad bent down to hold her hand and helped in removing the slippers with a sweet smile. He had very beautiful brown eyes.
An year later, a few people came to her house with a marriage proposal, seeing the groom before marriage was not permitted during those days but after their wedding, she got a glimpse of a familiar sweet smile. She was sent to her maternal home for a few months after the wedding rituals as per customs, with a little spark of affection for the boy who held her in the temple.
Fifteen months later, she entered her husband’s home. Mother and elders had given her a long list of do’s and don’ts for her wedded life. She felt very timid at the age of seventeen among the strange prying eyes. It was her mother-in-law who called her inside the room when she met her spouse for the very first time. Her fluttering heart found solace in those two shining brown eyes. She was lost in the warmth of her husband’s comforting eyes and a broad smile. He had something about him, that brought calmness to her chirpy skittish self.
Secrets of How to Be Happy in a Relationship
They started a new life together without any wisdom. With each passing day, they learned new things and gained experience. He was a suave tall man with ‘English’ features, while she was a modest lady, they developed trust and respect for each other. Despite odds, together they fought life battles, poverty, social pressures, and judgments. He brought calmness to her anxious heart and in return she was completely dedicated to him.
If made for each other is to be personified, they were the ideal match. In the first few years of marriage, they made five promises for a happy married life –
1. Always Communicate for a happy relationship –
No matter what the situation is, however ugly the fight or argument is, always communicate with each other without any appeasement. Openly share your feelings without holding back or any resentment.
Open communication is the most basic thing to have a happy relationship with your spouse. Not communicating means you are building resentment and slowly it will cloud your judgment and distance yourself from those you really love.
2. Compromise –
A successful relationship requires a few sacrifices and compromises to meet on a common ground. That doesn’t mean to stop living your life and forgo what you like the most. But, compromising on common grounds from both ends for a shared goal, a happy married life.
Never let your ego and selfish motives come in between your marriage. That doesn’t mean you have to agree with each other every time or vice-versa, but, as a couple you need to identify what’s best for ‘us’.
3. Respect –
You need to respect each other in a relationship and as two different individuals. Disrespecting each other will only add resentment and fade away the charm of love. Both partners must value each other’s choices and respect the differences of opinion.
Every healthy relationship is based on the foundation of respect. Disrespecting your spouse in front of others will only pull down their self-respect and eventually end up in a loveless marriage.
4. Spending Quality Time Together and Away –
Spending time away from each other is as important a component as staying together for a happy married life. Time spent away brings novelty in life and strikes the right balance in a relationship.
Spending quality time with each other apart from living together as a couple means a huge difference. Movie nights, dinner dates, vacations, and holidays to enjoy each other’s company bring a new leash of life in a relationship.
5. Refrain from Criticising for a Happy Relationship –
While keeping expectations real in life, one must not indulge in over-criticism. All relationships go through their ups and downs, but that doesn’t cause any one partner to become hyper-critical. If your partner is sensitive about something, be patient and give him/her a little time.
These were the promises they made to each other 60-odd years ago and never broke each other’s trust even once. Sushma looked up from her chair, everyone was amusingly listening to her. She saw Nidhi clutching at Kaveesh’s hand while Madhu and Rishab were sitting by the sofa looking at their mother with contentment.
Sushma got up from her chair, when Nidhi asked, ‘Ba, this felt like a real story, who was that little girl and brown-eyed boy?’ She didn’t reply to her granddaughter’s question, just smiled waving at a memorial portrait hung on the wall. A handsome wrinkled face of her late grandfather was smiling back at Nidhi with comforting brown eyes.
Do you like reading fiction, here is a suspense story just for you, Click here.
This post is written for the Speakeasy 3.0 blogging challenge hosted by myself and Ruchi Verma.
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28 Comments
I loved your connotation.. That happily ever after should be defined by us and not the society or others. Because happily ever after varies to everyone and we should define our happy married life. The storytelling is very nice, I loved how beautifully you have told the truths with the help of fiction.
I am so glad you like the story, thank you, Swarnali.
Whenever I see an elderly couple, I imagine how their youth would have been. You gave me a story to think when I see those white tresses with salted beard. Loved your narration .
You are so right. With waning patience in the younger generation, the wisdom of love and waiting has somehow faded
That is a very ‘happily ever after’ real life story. We can learn so much from happy couples, who enjoy each other’s company. You have pointed out the principles for a happy relationship so nicely. Trust and communication matter so much in defining a good relationship.
Thank you, Ambica. I am so glad you like it.
Through Sushma’s tale, you’ve woven a tapestry of wisdom that resonates deeply with the essence of meaningful relationships. Your post is a reminder that crafting a successful relationship is an art that blends open communication, compromise, respect, shared experiences, and gentle understanding. Thank you for sharing these open secrets that contribute to the tapestry of a happy and lasting relationship.
Thank you for stopping by, I am so glad you like the story narration and the essence of this post.
Wow you have weaved this story with some very important relationship lessons. I think communication is the key of any relationship but for me it’s the respect which is of utmost importance.
Respect matters the most, in every relationship. Thank you for sharing your feedback.
You have beautifully weaved a story to highlight the key takers for a happy marriage. Loved the narration and how beautifully emphasised each pointers for a happily ever after. For me communication and not criticising your spouse is the key.
I am glad you liked the take, thank you so much for participating in SpeakEasy
The story narration is amazing. Clear communication and respect is very important. No matter how much we claim of love but if no respect is there in the relationship then its not honest love.
I agree, respect and self-respect both matters a lot in building a healthy relationship. Thank you
I totally agree with the communication and respect needed for a healthy relationship. I have noticed in all these years that both these aspects go a long way in a relationship.
Absolutely! These are some tried and tested ways to save a relationship and make it happy. Thank you for participating in SpeakEasy.
Good tips. You know usually people dont advice to take time away, but you have made an important point, it is so important to have some time away from each other too, and fill your own cups so that can sweeten the time when you both are together. o
I know what you mean, but honestly, staying away has its own perks. Glad you like the post. Thank you for participating in SpeakEasy.
Beautiful story, Relationship is all about being in tandem with one another. One is off balance and things can go for a toss. Like they say it takes two to tango, like wise for a relationship. Respect, space and understanding are the foremost things for a smooth sailing.
I absolutely agree with you. Thank you for participating in SpeakEasy.
You have wonderfully communicated the pointers in form of a story.. very well weaved off the narration.
I am glad you like it
If I were to choose just 1 of the top secrets, it would be compromise. You just can’t expect to have everything your mind decides as being your right or you being deserving. But again, if both parties practice compromise to some extent, it helps to get a happy married life!
I absolutely agree with you. Compromises on both sides make a relationship stronger, but at the same time, we need to appreciate & respect those sacrifices. Thank you for participating in SpeakEasy.
This is surely a unique take on the prompt and like how you conveyed point through Susham msg.
Thank you for participating.
You have given the best of ingredients needed to make a relationship work. And I think the one thing that spices up the relationship and keeps it going is communication. Its absolutely imperative to have an open line of communication coupled with the ability to listen to each other. Very well written. Loved reading the post and the secrets of happy relationship.
I absolutely agree! Communication is important for no matter which relationship we are talking about. Thank you for participating in SpeakEasy.