When motherhood knocked at my door, I wasn’t ready for this new role…. Contemplating many ‘WHATs‘& ‘HOWs‘ I finally took up this challenge with a confused state of mind. Slowly and steadily the new developments got sync in my system – I am going to be a Mother! As exciting the thought was; same were the mammoth of unanswered questions.
Career/ Ambition everything seems fazed with slight movements of joy… monthly hearbeats acoustic checks & sonograms were so eagerly missed, my entire universe turned towards this little alien inside me. Soon my always turning – twisting alien was in my hands. Tiny miniscule of US!!!
With her arrival came many changes and what best then learning from all sources available… either through familiar advices from neighbouring aunties or quarterly calls from far fetched realatives. Online sources turned out to be real mecca of help for me. With some lifestyle and behavioural changes I sailed through the toughest crucial days smiling. Today reminiscing past, I realize few lessons are for lifetime…. so here is my list of those Five which I learned as a Mother.
1. Prioritize: Decide your Priorities!! My whole universe revolves around her, to be with her I had to make some tough choices.
You don’t get to live the same moment twice, so all I had to work on is “what I actually want from life?” Shifting career on back burner haunted me for days and nights, but when I recall her first step, calling me “mum-mum” for the very first time, when I saw her first milkey white, I don’t repent my decision. Even today, for me mapping out the priorities is a must to-do work.
2. Be true to Yourself: be the way you are! You have been promoted from all relations to the most Supreme one – Motherhood. With an added responsibility of a child, you cannot transform into a SUPERHERO overnite.
There were times when I left things unattended, house unkept, did not comb my hair, could not cook three course meals, rushed home abruptly from family gathering without giving ritual goodbyes…. but I still managed the humongous task of ‘taking good care of my child‘ beautifully.
Do not kill peace of your mind from borrowed expectations!!
3. Confidence is the Key to success: as a business communication expert I often explain my students; How crucial ‘Confidence‘ is in job interviews/ corporate culture. I remember once my marketing professor told me; “your confidence can even make you sell a comb to a bald person.”
As a mother, we have to contemplate with many set standards and age old family regimes. With confidence, and right mind-set nothing is impossible. Mental confidence helps you achieve the unthinkable, my motherhood mantra tells me to, ‘do what is right for your kid’.
4. Be a realistic mom: who doesn’t want their child to outshine others? Every mother’s/ parent’s dream is to see their child on top of the lists…. but are your demands REALISTIC? Not long ago I overheard (sorry for that) a couple’s loud conversation about their child’s selection in extra-curriculum category. Mother wanted kid to join some weirdly named Mathematics Course and Father wanted Soccer!! But nobody even bothered to ask their sonny boy (who was playfully strumming invisible guitar in thin air) what he wants….. clearly he loved music.
Comparisons & Competing is good only when they are healthy and positive. As a mother I learned to be realistic with my aspirations and demands either from myself or from my child. Motherhood makes us strong not only as an individual but a pillar for our kids.
5. Start accepting: mistakes are humble reminder of: we are humans too! Motherhood is a learning process, an unending dynamic process. You get to learn on the job/ first-hand experience with things. It’s ALRIGHT to be WRONG at times (remember we are not Super-Humans) once my husband teased me over my mistake commenting; ‘Tu Maa Hai Maa, How Can You Go Wrong‘, geeezz… I brushed him off but that is exactly what other’s expect from you. To be PERFECT always.
As a mother, I learned not to shy away from making mistakes…. but to put a step forward and accept. Yes, it gives peace, and also a lesson to the child…. never find a blame dame! These are few lessons I learned amd wanted to share with all readers… sharing is caring :).