“Mom Uncle doesn’t love me anymore; he never picks me up or let me piggy back…”
As a mother of a growing girl, I am usually on the receiving end of mindless questions and many funny accusations, but this statement set me back to analyse what could be the probable cause of this sudden outburst of emotions from a 4 years old.
With kid in a family you get accepted in social circles warmly; when my little girl came to this world, I had many visitors who I had no idea even existed in the same vicinity 😉 A growing kid brings array of uncalled advises, statutory warnings, do’s & don’ts from friendly faces.
My kiddo’s best buddy stays next door hence they often play in either of the houses; theirs or mine… and since our families know each other well, so it’s safe to leave kids without watching over. One odd day my daughter came back looking sad, when asked what’s the matter she said: “uncle doesn’t like me, when I play with him, he goes away, but with Ananya (her friend) he’s not like this… I am not his daughter na, mumma!“
With so many inhumane cases of Child abuse making rounds in news dailies, it’s not a rocket science to understand such vulnerable state of mind from a grown up of opposite sex. Specially when the facts and figures shout back at you (over 53% of child abuse cases reported in 2016) and perpetrators are usually KNOWN to the victims. I shared this concern with my partner, who agreed to even his dilemma of touching, hugging, playing close or picking up our daughter’s girl friends!!
Where are we heading to? Trust & Compassion were the pillars of our social structure, but today these two most common and essential ingredients are missing. I have time and again reprimanded my girl about bad behavior/touch from known/strangers, but never bothered to think from this angle (from the good Uncle’s view) Trust sways on such thin thread today, that a small swish of breathe can also rip it apart.
While growing up in a small city of Northern India; I had a wonderful childhood memories. Coming from a closed knit society definitely means nagging aunties and grumpy uncles, but it also meant security! It also meant I have trusted people around me! It also meant I am safe even if out of my house or parents watch.
Childhood makes happy memories for lifetime, but how are we supposed to make our generation’s childhood happier if we don’t send them out to explore, to mingle, to make mistakes, to learn, to wander….. let them be free, let them enjoy, let them fall, let them take control, let them be KIDS. It’s us (adults) who have to bring back our trust in one another. Putting up barriers will not solve any purpose, but only hinder the growth. So let’s start making a better tomorrow for our kids & ourselves.
Thanks for reading…. 🙂